Part of the reason I love both the original and remake of "Dawn of the Dead" is the location for each movie - the mall. How many hours have I spent running around a mall? How many days of my high school life were spent at a mall? I'm not much of a shopper (never had much money) but for some reason I always felt drawn there. And the movie comments on this very well.
But there are more things than zombies to worry about in a mall. A few survival tips are in order:
1) Never EVER look the Cell Phone Kiosk Dudes in the eye. Deadly.
2) Just because Best Buy is in the mall doesn't mean you should go there.
3) When they say no strollers on the escalator they mean it for a reason...sheesh. And I was the one pushing the stroller!!!
4) Stop frequenting the Hat Store (do they still call them "haberdasheries" still?) or Lids or whatever. Buy one cap and wear it out. You don't need 20 hats for your wardrobe.
5) And lastly, the Apple Store breaks the record for most employees not doing a gottdamm thing but still looking like they are busy while wearing the neon T-shirts that are from an ad campaign that started like 12 years ago. SERIOUSLY! I counted TWENTY-ONE employees (wearing either orange, blue, or black) and when Dr. BW wanted to check out, how many were manning the check-out? One and a half. Unbelievable.
So. For the Cell Phone Kiosk Dudes, the entire Best Buy company, the Hat Store Dudes, and ESPECIALLY the Apple Dudes and Dudettes...
May the ZOMBIES eat you first...
And a special honorable mention - the entire Porter Square CVS staff for having world record setting crappy service and the longest check-out times in any store ever frequented by anyone at any point in the history of man, alien, capitalism, free market trade, haggling, or simply borrowing a cup of rocks from the next door cave neighbors.
In a tightly contested matchup, Orion pulls away from the Pleiades within the last week to win this month's Biscuit World Poll. All the stargazers in the BW Community came out to vote and the votes were widely spread, even Canis Major getting a vote! The Pleiades and Orion were deadlocked for quite some time but The Hunter pulled this one out.
BW's fave was Cassiopeia but, then again, BW does have a little vested interest in the name Orion at least...
Congratulations to our star-studded contestants and especially our victor. May your belt always, ALWAYS, hold up your celestial pants!!!
In June of this year, our country will be of the beverage, by the beverage, and for the beverage!!!
Mountain Dew releases THREE new flavors to be voted upon by the beverage-drinking public. Although VOLTAGE is already out and BW has tried that one, we will wait to do a full product review until all products have been released. [NOTE: The other two were supposedly released the same day (May 19) but BW has yet to find them! Attn: Pepsi! Send FREE LIFETIME SAMPLES!]
The three new Mountain Dew flavors (all with ginseng) are:
VOLTAGE - Raspberry Citrus
SUPERNOVA - Strawberry Melon
and REVOLUTION - Wild Berry
All flavors were designed virtually online by Dew Drinkers and now the top three battle it out for posterity.
BW is a Mountain Dew fan. To say the least. Apart from the Canadian-only releases, Slurpee-only flavors, and those brands only test-marketed in other cities, BW has a pretty good grasp on what's what in the World of Mountain Dew. You want a list? Alrighty then...
BW's Top Mountain Dew Flavors (colors in parentheses):
1) The Original (yellow-green) - Can't mess with the original recipe...
2) Code Red (red) - Infused with Cherry!
3) Baja Blast (teal) - Lime-flavored and currently only available in the CambridgeSide Taco Bell
4) Game Fuel (red-orange) - Limited Edition Halo 3 drink for Gamers...oh, how we miss thee!
5) Voltage (periwinkle?) - Newest Contender in the Dewmocracy War!
6) LiveWire (orange) - Originally a summer 2003 release intended for SUMMER ONLY (it's still here)
7) Pitch Black II (deep purple, heh) - Sour grape sequel to original Halloween-release of Pitch Black I
Stay tuned for more reviews! And don't forget the new poll tomorrow!!!
Just in time for the May 22nd Premiere! Kellogg's presents LIMITED EDITION Indiana Jones Cereal!
So, I'm a cereal connoisseur. The routine was come home from school, get a bowl of cereal, watch YCDTOTV ("You Can't Do That On Television"). I have no idea how many bowls I have eaten in my lifetime but it has to number in the millions.
Now, this one takes me back to Saturday morning serials. Pun intended. The marketing tie-in of course got me but it's a quality product. Chocolate puffs with Marshmallows. Pretty standard fare but the marshmallows are on par with those of Lucky Charms and the chocolate flavor is great.
Initially, I thought the puffs might be too "puffy", if that makes sense. Definitely not like Cocoa Puffs here. Those can get pretty crunchy. The Indy puffs are closer to a 2 or 3 on the 1=puffy, 10=crunchy scale. However, I was pleasantly surprised after the MIM test (Minutes In Milk). Only the part of the puff submerged got soggy so it left a hemisphere still intact. Some cereal puffs lose all their shell if even a portion touches the milk. A tragedy of milk osmosis saturation.
One tiny complaint here though. The marshmallows. I mean, take a look at the photographic evidence. That's supposed to be a skull, a torch, Indy's hat, and the Temple of Akator. Seriously? We can put a man on the moon but we can't get marshmallow technology down? I'm waiting for the day of full-on, 3-D, anatomically correct Marshmallow Men. Kind of gross maybe but I say we do it BECAUSE WE CAN. We may never reach that plateau. Until then, we'll have to stick with what we got.
Indiana Jones Cereal. Gets 4 Orions out of 5. It boosts the anticipation of the movie and was good to eat up to 3 bowls in a row!
Mutants Triumphant! The X-Men top the list of our April poll beating out the classic super-team, the Justice League.
BW voted for the winner this time around. Did the movie franchise put this over the top? Probably so. But it also could be the all-inclusive nature of the team itself. A team that welcomes all shapes and sizes (especially Famke Janssen!) even all colors (blue preferred). After all, aren't we all just a little bit mutant?
Congrats, X-Team on your win. Keep saving the world and pushing for equal rights for homo superior!
Oh, and a word of condolence to the poor chap who voted for the Watchmen. Mental note: that's not going to end so well...
BW NOTE: Favorite X-Man of all time is Rogue.
I have wrestled with this for about 2 weeks now. But I think I have made my final decision.
