Never let it be said that this blog is visited by normal people.
The majority of you voted for the Fire Elemental.
The majority of you voted for Summertime Air-Conditioning.
There is a contradiction here, no?
Speaking of elementals, hopefully, none of you have seen The Last Airbender, seeing as how rottentomatoes.com gave it a score of 8 out of 100. Dang, Shamalanadingdong! Who's giving you money to make movies these days?
Anyway, nice work, Fire and Ice.
7/30/10
OMG #13
I just caught an episode of Jimmy Fallon last night, not sure if it was a rerun or new...
Anyway, kudos to Jimmy on showcasing lesser-known bands and all that...blahblahblah.
I'm not so into The Roots as he is, even having them as his house band.
BUT
Last night the band Of Montreal was on.
They sang some song about "You look like a playground, playah!"
They all had white make-up on their faces, except for the black singer.
There were like 300 people on stage. Not sure the instrumentation warranted that.
Three or so of them were just sitting in the middle drinking milk or something.
The song absofrickinlutely sucked.
It sucked to the point that I was still cringing while thinking about it and TRYING to sleep...
Don't listen/suppport/internet/google/care about Of Montreal. You will save yourself time and money.
You're welcome.
Anyway, kudos to Jimmy on showcasing lesser-known bands and all that...blahblahblah.
I'm not so into The Roots as he is, even having them as his house band.
BUT
Last night the band Of Montreal was on.
They sang some song about "You look like a playground, playah!"
They all had white make-up on their faces, except for the black singer.
There were like 300 people on stage. Not sure the instrumentation warranted that.
Three or so of them were just sitting in the middle drinking milk or something.
The song absofrickinlutely sucked.
It sucked to the point that I was still cringing while thinking about it and TRYING to sleep...
Don't listen/suppport/internet/google/care about Of Montreal. You will save yourself time and money.
You're welcome.
7/12/10
OMG #12 - THE WALKING DEAD!!!
My favorite comic book is coming to the small screen!AMC will take on The Walking Dead, written by Kentuckian Robert Kirkman, this October.
AARGGHH! If only Atlanta was a little bit closer...
"Okay, buddy, you and Daddy are going to go on a little drive.
Then we might need to chew on some brains for a TV show..."
NEW Product Review! Or is it Product ReDEW?
For those of you out of the beverage loop, Mountain Dew just completed its second summer of Dewmocracy! Three new flavors were sold in stores for a limited time and then voted on by Dew Aficionados such as myself. The first Dewmocracy winner was the indigo-tinted flavor called Voltage that is in stores as we speak.
This year we had three new flavors to contend with:
Distortion - Lime Blasted Dew
Typhoon - Punch of Tropical Dew
Whiteout - Smooth Citrus Dew
I voted for Distortion this year. The lime was very present and it was quite refreshing.
I liked Typhoon enough but it seemed to me to be the incestuous offspring of LiveWire and Code Red.
Whiteout was white. It didn't quite taste like chalky soda but it might as well have.
Alas, since this post is about a month late to the party, the official results having been released on June 15th, we here at BW are saddened with the outcome.
Whiteout was victorious with 44% of the vote. Typhoon had 40% and Distortion a disappointing 16%. If Distortion was a Central American futbol player he was probably shivved in a bar fight by a broken Dos Equis beer bottle the weekend following his return home.
For the official tally go HERE. It's actually worth it to see a state-by-state (AND county-by-county) breakdown! Thank you, Oklahoma, for valiantly trying to put Distortion on the store shelves. The Ol' Okie Doke just wasn't enough this time around...
OMG #11
THE KARATE KID (2010) IS A MOVIE ABOUT KUNG FU!
IT IS NOT ABOUT KARATE!
BUT THE NAME OF THE MOVIE IS NOT THE KUNG FU KID!
(which actually sounds better, now that I think about it)
IT HAS ALREADY MADE 200+ MILLION DOLLARS!
WHY DO PEOPLE KEEP GOING TO THIS CRAP?
OMG #10
MTV's The Real World just recently started its 24th season...
TWENTY FREAKIN FOUR!
I was old when it started in 1992. What does that make me now???!!!
Anyway, for you trivia buffs out there, New Orleans is the setting for this season and is only the second city behind New York to have the location repeated...
Also, the season will most likely focus on some race fights, gay romance, and maybe somebody getting thrown out of the house. Heh.
May 2010 Poll - Y'all love some ebola!
So. Been a while. How YOU doin.
May's poll asked for worst of the worst natural disasters. You all went overwhelmingly for CONTRACTIBLE DISEASE. Nice work. Well done. Too bad that knowledge won't save you from the oncoming zombie apocalypse. Have fun until then.
5/29/10
OMG #9
Okay. TOTALLY bugging me.
The new Volkswagen commercials with people hitting everyone all over the place.
"Black one." PUNCH
"Blue one." PUNCH
You are destroying my childhood for a new model that has nothing to do with this game.
It's called PUNCH BUG RED or PUNCH BUG BLUE...
Sheesh.
(Do I have too much time on my hands?)
The new Volkswagen commercials with people hitting everyone all over the place.
"Black one." PUNCH
"Blue one." PUNCH
You are destroying my childhood for a new model that has nothing to do with this game.
It's called PUNCH BUG RED or PUNCH BUG BLUE...
Sheesh.
(Do I have too much time on my hands?)
5/6/10
OMG #8
Umm. Yeah. Noah can suck it. And Utnapishtim. AND Deucalion!Well, you get the picture.
Thankfully, BW HQ escaped unscathed. Well, we did have 2 inches of water in the basement but that went away so it doesn't count.
It really was utter destruction. And it's going to take FOREVER to clean up.
Some people got hit in every way imaginable. Reminds you what tragedy can be.
But we will prevail and continue to post asinine, trivial nonsense on the Internets!
Give to Hands On Nashville or any other googled charity group around here if you so feel the urge. An initial estimate puts rebuilding at near 1 Billion (yes, Dr. Evil, I said Billion, with a "B").
Stay tuned for a Mountain Dew Product Review!!!*
*really does seem pointless after all this...
April 2010 Poll - Why so serious?
My sister-in-law's husband competed in a homemade ice cream contest a while ago and made a flavor called "Why So Strawberry?" Pure. Genius.The winner of last month's poll for best Batman villain is obviously The Joker. Probably due to Heath Ledger's (RIP) amazing portrayal in the latest Bat-movie. Anyway, BW voted for Mr. Freeze in SPITE of Ahnold's portrayal of him solely due to the handling of Victor in The Animated Series (and the adjunct movie).
Anyway, have a good laugh on us, Mr. J. This town, indeed, needs an enema. And we got one, too! Thanks 13 inches of rain in like 4 minutes!
4/6/10
4/5/10
March 2010 Poll - I'm Late! I'm LATE!
Few days late on the poll numbers BUT...
The winner of your favourite Alice in Wonderland character (technically, I suppose, Through the Looking Glass) is the White Rabbit! This was BW's fave as well, probably because of its Disney depiction bringing back good memories or gas or something...
Nice job, dude. Hurry up. You are late. Grace Slick is going to be pissed!
The winner of your favourite Alice in Wonderland character (technically, I suppose, Through the Looking Glass) is the White Rabbit! This was BW's fave as well, probably because of its Disney depiction bringing back good memories or gas or something...
Nice job, dude. Hurry up. You are late. Grace Slick is going to be pissed!
3/21/10
OMG #6
Call it a case of HD snobbery.
I have noticed over the past year that text has increasingly become smaller and smaller on TV shows and even video games (Alas, the zombies-at-the-mall game Dead Rising on our old TV was frustratingly unreadable and hence unplayable).
I suppose the thinking is that most people have HD TVs now so we can make script smaller and smaller cuz pixel size doesn't necessarily matter on HD. Not to mention if this trend continues people are going to go blind watching HD cuz they don't realize their eyes are really straining to see such small text.
And so it goes with this year's NCAA basketball tourney. The scores at the top of the screen from other games are so small they are unreadable. Is that 67-60? Or 67-58? Or 57-60? OR 57-58? ARRGHHH!!!
Another thing is to blame here as well. I am pretty into fonts. Not enough to be persuaded to buy font packages online mind you, but still pretty into them. And choice of font is where most sports channels fail miserably. Pick a font where the 5, 6, 8, 9, and 0 are easily determined and distinct from one another. Otherwise, it just drives your audience crazy. Drives ME crazy.
Thank you.
PS Now that Northern Iowa has effectively destroyed half of America's brackets by beating Kansas, good luck everyone!!!
I have noticed over the past year that text has increasingly become smaller and smaller on TV shows and even video games (Alas, the zombies-at-the-mall game Dead Rising on our old TV was frustratingly unreadable and hence unplayable).
I suppose the thinking is that most people have HD TVs now so we can make script smaller and smaller cuz pixel size doesn't necessarily matter on HD. Not to mention if this trend continues people are going to go blind watching HD cuz they don't realize their eyes are really straining to see such small text.
And so it goes with this year's NCAA basketball tourney. The scores at the top of the screen from other games are so small they are unreadable. Is that 67-60? Or 67-58? Or 57-60? OR 57-58? ARRGHHH!!!
Another thing is to blame here as well. I am pretty into fonts. Not enough to be persuaded to buy font packages online mind you, but still pretty into them. And choice of font is where most sports channels fail miserably. Pick a font where the 5, 6, 8, 9, and 0 are easily determined and distinct from one another. Otherwise, it just drives your audience crazy. Drives ME crazy.
Thank you.
PS Now that Northern Iowa has effectively destroyed half of America's brackets by beating Kansas, good luck everyone!!!
3/8/10
Top 5 Arnold Schwarzenegger Movies
5. Conan the Barbarian/Commando (tie)
4. The Running Man
3. True Lies
2. Terminator 2
1. Predator (if there is another "Greatest Movie of All TIME" I have not seen it)
4. The Running Man
3. True Lies
2. Terminator 2
1. Predator (if there is another "Greatest Movie of All TIME" I have not seen it)
3/1/10
Top 5 Current Playlist
5. Stone Temple Pilots Core
4. Pink Floyd Animals
3. Doves Kingdom of Rust
2. Dora the Explorer Party Favorites
1. Thomas and Friends Thomas' Train Yard Tracks
Um, yeah.
4. Pink Floyd Animals
3. Doves Kingdom of Rust
2. Dora the Explorer Party Favorites
1. Thomas and Friends Thomas' Train Yard Tracks
Um, yeah.
February 2010 - BC Saskatchewan Love
So, your favourite Canadian ProvinCES are British Columbia and Saskatchewan.
BW can't argue with the fact that Saskatchewan is loads of fun to say. And BC has been in the spotlight lately...thank Cthulhu that Neil Young was at the Closing Ceremonies last night. Otherwise, they would have completely sucked. Nickelback? Avril Lavigne? Nickelback?
Nickelback?
Man. Sorry about your musicians, Canada. I'm telling you it would have been 300% better with Alanis Morrisette and Rush instead.
Congratulations, Provinces. Sorry there was no love for the Territories. BW voted Nova Scotia. We still hope to travel there sometime before we die or before Cthulhu rises again from his slumber.
BW can't argue with the fact that Saskatchewan is loads of fun to say. And BC has been in the spotlight lately...thank Cthulhu that Neil Young was at the Closing Ceremonies last night. Otherwise, they would have completely sucked. Nickelback? Avril Lavigne? Nickelback?
Nickelback?
Man. Sorry about your musicians, Canada. I'm telling you it would have been 300% better with Alanis Morrisette and Rush instead.
Congratulations, Provinces. Sorry there was no love for the Territories. BW voted Nova Scotia. We still hope to travel there sometime before we die or before Cthulhu rises again from his slumber.
2/13/10
Top 5 Things Missing from the Vancouver Olympics
5. Fur Trading
4. Hosers
3. Ginger Ale
2. The Kids from DeGrassi
1. The band RUSH
NO RUSH???!!! Are you freaking deaf?
4. Hosers
3. Ginger Ale
2. The Kids from DeGrassi
1. The band RUSH
NO RUSH???!!! Are you freaking deaf?
2/1/10
January 2010 Poll - '03 and '07 Champs!
What looked like a victory for 2007 for most of the month ended up as a tie.
Your favorite Aught (BW STILL upset about misspelling that one...) is actually 2007 AND 2003.
The Boy was born in 2007. That's why BW voted for it.
But '03 had its moments for the BW family as well.
Congratulations, youse guys.
BTW, 2001 received ZERO votes. Not a favorite, huh? Just 9/11 or something else, we wonder...
Your favorite Aught (BW STILL upset about misspelling that one...) is actually 2007 AND 2003.
The Boy was born in 2007. That's why BW voted for it.
But '03 had its moments for the BW family as well.
Congratulations, youse guys.
BTW, 2001 received ZERO votes. Not a favorite, huh? Just 9/11 or something else, we wonder...
1/13/10
Top 5 Things on my DVR right now...
5. Conspiracy Theory w/Jesse Ventura
4. Steven Seagal Lawman
3. How I Met Your Mother
2. Fringe
1. The Big Bang Theory
*Honorable Mention: The 2nd Season of Tosh.0 starts tomorrow night on Comedy Central. Think E's "The Soup" but about the Internets. Sweet.
4. Steven Seagal Lawman
3. How I Met Your Mother
2. Fringe
1. The Big Bang Theory
*Honorable Mention: The 2nd Season of Tosh.0 starts tomorrow night on Comedy Central. Think E's "The Soup" but about the Internets. Sweet.
1/7/10
Heh #11
It was recently brought to my attention that my poll should say "aught" and not "ought".
As someone who has a pet peeve about spelling and the Internet, you would think this was a mistake, right?
I mean, I could sit here and suggest that it was meant to be spelled that way cuz those were the years we "ought" to have done this, "ought" to have done that, etc.
Alas, that is not the case.
Internet/Poor Spelling: 1
Biscuit World: 0
As someone who has a pet peeve about spelling and the Internet, you would think this was a mistake, right?
I mean, I could sit here and suggest that it was meant to be spelled that way cuz those were the years we "ought" to have done this, "ought" to have done that, etc.
Alas, that is not the case.
Internet/Poor Spelling: 1
Biscuit World: 0
1/4/10
Playoff Precog!!!
Week 17 Record: 10-6
Cumulative Record: 140-83 (62.78% Winning Percentage)
Well. At least I made it above .500, huh?
Not too shabby as Adam Sandler would say.
This is a one and done for the playoffs.
Thanks for humoring me. It will probably (definitely) be the only time I attempt this for a whole season...
NFC:
Packers over Cardinals
Eagles over Cowboys
Saints over Eagles
Packers over Vikings
Saints over Packers
AFC:
Patriots over Ravens
Bengals over Jets
Chargers over Bengals
Colts over Patriots
Chargers over Colts
Superbowl Champion: Saints over Chargers 38-27
Peep dat.
Cumulative Record: 140-83 (62.78% Winning Percentage)
Well. At least I made it above .500, huh?
Not too shabby as Adam Sandler would say.
This is a one and done for the playoffs.
Thanks for humoring me. It will probably (definitely) be the only time I attempt this for a whole season...
NFC:
Packers over Cardinals
Eagles over Cowboys
Saints over Eagles
Packers over Vikings
Saints over Packers
AFC:
Patriots over Ravens
Bengals over Jets
Chargers over Bengals
Colts over Patriots
Chargers over Colts
Superbowl Champion: Saints over Chargers 38-27
Peep dat.
1/3/10
Pigskin Precog - Week 17...sigh
Week 16 Record: 11-5
Cumulative Record: 130-77
It's finally here. The last week of the regular season. Did pretty well, notwithstanding the minor hiccups here and there (like missing two whole weeks!). But, fun for me to do in public and see how things came out. I plan on doing one and only one Precog for the Playoffs once the teams are set.
And the winners will be...
Bills Texans Vikings 49ers
Bucs Steelers Bears Saints
Jaguars Eagles Titans Chargers
Packers Broncos Ravens Bengals
Outtie 5000.
Cumulative Record: 130-77
It's finally here. The last week of the regular season. Did pretty well, notwithstanding the minor hiccups here and there (like missing two whole weeks!). But, fun for me to do in public and see how things came out. I plan on doing one and only one Precog for the Playoffs once the teams are set.
And the winners will be...
Bills Texans Vikings 49ers
Bucs Steelers Bears Saints
Jaguars Eagles Titans Chargers
Packers Broncos Ravens Bengals
Outtie 5000.
December 2009 Poll - Junk and Junk Food
The last poll of 2009...internet drum roll please...10101010101010101010101010Oscar the Grouch and Cookie Monster TIE for favorite Sesame Street character!
BW voted for Ernie although I have to say Forgetful Jones was an inspired option on the poll, if I do say so myself, and I do.
Ironically, the Count got ZERO votes. As well as Guy Smiley and Zombie Mr. Hooper.
NEGATIVE points to whomever voted for Telly. SEE A THERAPIST! The only other character that drives me crazier is Baby Bear. PRONOUNCE YOUR R's, DUDE!
Happy 2010!!! Roy Scheider sends his love via email from the Monolith.
Nice work, Grouchy and Cookie.
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